How to fix boundaries in your relationship?

When it comes to creating and growing a healthy relationship, there is not anything more important than knowing what exactly we want. A big question is that, it seems so simple, and yet, why do we have such a difficult time doing it? 

Creating healthy boundaries, having respect and feeling safe in a relationship is a skill that can be developed by anyone. When it’s done from a place of genuine love for yourself and another, the return on your investment in yourself and your partner is so very much worth it. 

We need to come out from traditional approach while setting up healthy boundaries, finding your voice and not being afraid to call on your strength by being vulnerable with unstoppable injection of technological advancement in our personal life, which is key to answering these questions. There are a lot of ways to do this. In this article, I will get you brief ideas about some of important ones. 

📌 Listen to your Desires:

Find what works for you and stop bothering about any preconceived ideas your mind has created about willing to adjust when and where it’s needed. For this reason, I invite you to make the time to understand what you truly desire and be sure to communicate. 

Let's come out from need based arrangement in order to share with your partner, why you are feeling a need to communicate about these topics in your relationship. 

📌 Foundation of Love:

The foundation of love are built on kind of connection you establish. The so called terms of partnership get vanished when you are truly connected to someone. Your better tuning allows your partner to understand your feelings and needs from the beginning. This creates the foundation for fantastic relationships. 

Sometimes being selfish, it is easy to blame and shame the other to fulfill your needs. This does not foster a loving space for you. For this reason, getting clear on what your part of contribution is in the relationship is critically important. 

📌 Support, Honor & Respect:

Everyone is different for how they define safety, respect, honor and support. That is why it’s up to you to first determine what you need to feel these things. From there you must be willing to communicate this in a respectful way. 

It’s equally important to openly communicate with your partner so that they understand what you need and so you are clear on how they define safety, respect, honor and support for themselves. It might be very different from what either of you thought but only your action can bridge this gap. 

📌 Balance Sheet of Love:

It’s easy to ask for little in the begining of a relationship and difficult to ask for too much before it ends. How do you reconcile these extremes so that it results in a win-win for you and your partner? Is there a healthy balance sheet of compromising?  

Exploring about it can not only bring you and your partner closer, but also uncover assumptions that could have been potential issues down the road. If, however, having such a discussion opens up unhealed wounds, or creates an argument, allow yourself  the space to step away from the discussion. 

Each individual requires lone time in order to process and recharge. The amount of time need to be spent alone varies for people. Some need more and others less. If you’re unsure what this is for you and your partner, take the time to discover how you both define it and be sure to respect and honor this. Here is where the importance of balance comes in. 

The key to opening up and growing is finding balance because two different people are not exactly same in all areas, there is going to need to be balance for how you communicate and move through life together. 

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Vegan Sudesh

📲 8452036912

✉️ ask@sudesh.org